It sucks to get stuck.

Man, I hate writer’s block, or whatever you want to call it. I like to call it the “evil demon that keeps sucking ideas out of my brain before I can think of them,” but that’s a little long.

But what’s worse than writer’s block is looking at Twitter and seeing all the people who are NOT suffering from writer’s block. I love my fellow writers, I really do. I’m happy when they land a deal, I’m happy when they finish their WIP, but I’m also irritated at the same time. Not with them, but with myself.

It’s like, I see the giant roadblock rising from the ground ahead of me, but I can’t get my feet to turn around. My mind is screaming STOP! TURN AROUND! YOU’LL CRASH YOU DUMMY! But my body is like, hey, what’s this pretty brick thing–splat. That’s the sound of my body turning into a pancake as I propel headfirst into the obvious.

This post sounds very doom and gloom so far, and for that, I’m not really sorry. There’s no pretty way to describe what happens to a writer suffering from this ugly disease. And, it’s contagious too! So please vaccinate yourselves accordingly after reading this (or should it be before? I’m not sure…).

I have yet to come up with a completely full-proof method of curing writer’s block, but I do have a few tricks up my sleeve when it’s too late to avoid the situation entirely.

Step 1) Rage about it. Writing while angry just makes me angrier and hopeless-er. Get it all out, all the extra anger that gets dumped on you by the writer’s block fairy, so you can write under a normal amount of anger. Only you know how much anger that is.

Step 2) If raging doesn’t work, try crying. Maybe you’re the kind of person who communicates through tears, rather than yelling. I’m half and half. It’s totally okay to cry.

Step 3) Eat some chocolate.

Step 4) Find someone who believes in you, like REALLY believes in you, and let them build you up. It’s not  weakness to need someone now and then. Weakness is not letting others help you.

And last but not least…

Step 5) Go take a nap. No, seriously, take a nap. When you wake up you’ll have to push past that AWFUL ten minutes of grogginess, but once you do, you’ll feel refreshed. Go grab a cup of tea or coffee or glass of wine, snuggle up in some comfy clothes, and get back to work.

I hope these tricks work for you if you ever get stuck like I am right now. I’m hoping to employ step 3 today, and then step 5 all weekend.

In the meantime, here’s a nice song to listen to that may calm you down. Caution: it will make you want to be completely unproductive for the rest of the day if you watch the video, because you will want to find some empty beach and lay there forever.

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